So, I'm a dancer, and last year I hurt my hip and was unable to keep dancing. It was devastating. I pushed myself to keep going even when the pain was awful, until it was so bad that I had to stop. I went to the doctor and decided that surgery was the best option for me. This meant that I would have to stop dancing until I was fully recovered. Not dancing was really hard and was a big change. I was so used to being at the studio. It took time to reconcile the idea that this was the best decision in the long run. I had to battle myself to stay positive and look towards the time when I would be able to put my leotard back on.
ME: Ok, calm down, breathe, this is going to go just fine.
MIND: Of course, we love this doctor, he's going to do an amazing job.
ME: But what if I never dance agin?
MIND: That won't happen, I'm here to get you through this.
ME: I don't know what to do now.
MIND: Picture yourself in the dance studio.
ME: Ok, I miss that studio...What kind of dance am I doing?
MIND: You're doing ballet, right hand on the bar....Feel the music.
ME: Ok, I'm feeling it, I'm also feeling awful now knowing that I can't do it anymore.
MIND: Don't think like that...this is an image to aspire to. This WILL be you. You WILL dance again.
ME: I'm scared, this is going to be really hard.
MIND: I know, but I'm here for you, I love you. We will get through this together.
ME: Ok, I think I'm ready. Time to go to the hospital...
Fortunately, I have never needed surgery (knock on wood). I wonder what it is like to need anesthesia or need to go under the knife for something of that nature. Although I haven't experienced what you went through, I could almost feel what you were feeling the whole time.
ReplyDeleteKayla this was very well written. I remember this happening to you and how upset you were but you pushed through and look at you now =D. I have had a minor sugery on my knee before so i know what its like to have to sit out on the sport you love. But you pushed through and did amazing.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I have never had surgery, I know the feeling of not being able to do what is really in your heart, and how tough the process of making a big decision that may risk another part of you is. This is very well written and I really enjoyed reading it, great job!!
ReplyDeleteKayla I can practically hear your voice when I read this. I can tell this is really honest, because I hear you voice these worries a lot. Never broken anything in my life, so can't say i've been in the same situation, but I kind of understand that feeling of not being sure if you can do something you need to.
ReplyDeleteI can definitely relate because this happened to me with my toe and now with my knee so I know what you were going through. I agree with Nandini, you can almost like hear you saying these things, but I really like this.
ReplyDeletei know how you feel i had to get surgery in 6th grade because of my foot and i was out for fall and spring sports. this really does sound exactly like you and stuff that you would say. i like how you and your mind team up in a way to get through a very hard time!
ReplyDeleteI really like this piece because it's a struggle I've never really encountered. You did a good job with making your voice heard in this piece.
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